A lot of people don’t understand that being a clown isn’t only about being funny; timing and the element of surprise are the true keys to success. That, and of course, pies!
Same with my new job: When the time is right I creep into businesses, load up my oversized clown pockets, and disappear without a trace. Well… Not completely. You see, I didn’t always want to be a clown. When I was young I went to culinary school with dreams of becoming the best pastry chef in the world! By a cruel twist of fate, the countless hours that I spent studying my craft were my downfall: I baked so many pies that I became allergic to them! Did I let that stop me? Of course not!
I have so much pie that I consider it my duty to share the wealth, and I guess it’s become a bit of a calling card for me to leave one behind at every business that I hit. If I can’t enjoy my life’s work, then someone else has to! It warms my heart to sit in court and hear business owners say,
“He broke my window, stole my coins and my belongings, but GOSH what a delicious pie!”
That is what I live for. That’s why I get up every morning and do it again! Don’t blame me, blame my white chocolate devil’s food pie for being criminally delicious! Harangue my meringue for stealing your heart. Pay no notice to your empty house, because I took your art. Judge me not by the color of my face paint, but by the content of my cream filling!
Mark my words; I’ll definitely get my just “desserts”!
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